Now is the winter of our discontent…

Wow, things are looking bleak for poor old Blighty. Energy prices through the roof, bins not being emptied, food shortages, petrol shortages, staff shortages, [insert just about everything] shortages.

Unsurprisingly when you tell people not to panic-buy they automatically go out and panic buy. Personally, I have taken matters into my own hands and I have 1000 litres of petrol stored in old plastic milk jugs in the shed. They are next to the pile of illegal fireworks I picked up for Halloween. What could possibly go wrong? *

You would almost feel sorry for poor old Boris who has stumbled from one disaster to another practically every day of his premiership. Except of course a lot of his problems are of his own making. Still, we have had the plague and death, there is always famine and pestilence to look forward to.

It is not easy being red, white and blue. And it is defiantly not easy being green.

* In case my neighbours are reading this, I am joking.