Stormtroopers on red alert for St Paddy’s Day riots in South Belfast

Stormtroopers gathering outside Dublin Road Movie HouseLast night, the PSNI riot squad took part in a dress rehearsal in advance of any trouble in the university/Holylands area over the St Patrick’s Day long weekend.

One officer privately expressed concern that the new protective clothing “wouldn’t be taken seriously by tipsy students”. Another added that the pockets weren’t very accessible and there was no where to store his phone or his “emergency doughnut”.

A spokesperson explained that enhanced scrutiny of PSNI spending together with the reduction of budgets meant that “difficult procurement decisions had to be made”.

And in an alternative universe, fans queued up outside Dublin Road Movie House to view the 3D version of Star Wars Episode 1: The Phantom Menace.

May the force be with you …

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