“The first winner to totter down our stained red carpet…”

In The Observer, Andrew Rawnsley has some, admirably even-handed, fun distributing his alternative political awards of the year.

Time now to unveil the Assassin Of The Year. There could only be one winner: Ed Miliband knifed not just his brother, but also Nick Brown, Gordon Brown, Ed Balls and Yvette Cooper. The panel were particularly impressed that the first killer panda ever to lead a major British political party could keep a straight face when he said: “I love you, David” even as he walked over his older sibling’s corpse to claim the Labour leadership.

This ceremony would not be complete without recognising Nick Clegg and his extraordinary rollercoaster of a year. But which award would be appropriate? The judges found it very hard to agree. Panellists who remain sympathetic to Mr Clegg argued strongly that he ought to be acclaimed as Politician Of The Year. Did he not steal the leaders’ TV debates? Has he not brought Liberals into government for the first time since Churchill’s wartime coalition more than 60 ago? Is he not now burnt in effigy on the streets? Even the latter is a truly historic achievement. Never before could anyone be bothered to set light to a Liberal leader.

Heh.  Do read the whole thing.

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  • andnowwhat

    Funny enough, I was drunkingly recalling theLibDem leadership race last night. As I remember it, Clegg fought a very dirty fight indeed.

    I think Clegg has stolen Blair’s title of “Party Leader who represents his part members least”.

    Whatever happened to that lovely party that seriously discussed the legalistionj of dope for decades?

  • pippakin

    I’m tempted by the Cane and Abel story. But my favourite has to be whoever pushed GA toward Louth. Subtle. A most un Sinn Fein characteristic…

  • andnowwhat

    Hi Pippa. Merry Christmas.

    SF are very good at subtle eg.letting men needlissly die of hunger and let on for 20 odd years that there was no other choice.

    Hopefully. GA’s gaelic will improve when he is down there.

    BTW, if I could send you a personal message on here I could tell you something that might make your opinion of GA soften somewhat. It relates to the family issue and it is first hand.

  • pippakin


    I’m consumed with curiosity! which makes a change from tobacco…

    I’ve never been unsympathetic to GAs family ‘problem’, but I’m less understanding of ‘afterward’, which leads me neatly to the little blog. I think it has an email facility. Not certain because being my amateur little hobby I cancelled all access I could.

    If you want to GA is referred to in item ten.

    Yes, I agree SF or PIRA or both kept their secret for a long time and even now it is as the Scots would say unproven.

  • lover not a fighter

    The only noticable ability that David Miliband had/has to lead the Labour party is that Rupert Murdock may give him an approving nod.

    Even some of the Liberal Democrats (Vince for example) have realized that this is no great benediction.

  • Rory Carr

    So Ed Milliband earns the title of Political Assassin of the Year for his audacity in winning the confidence of the Labour Party and David Milliband is perceived as a victim for failing to gain such approval despite being the approved candidate of all those whose interests are diametrically opposed to the interests of labour. Shouldn’t be allowed. What’s the point of bourgeois democracy if the bourgeoisie are not able to maintain absolute control of it?

    Where is George Wigg when you need him? Dead you say? Fat lot of fucking use he is then !