Government, according to Prime Minister Tony Blair, is a bit like learning to unicycle.. No, really! The admission came during a Question and Answer session with party delegates in Brighton.. chaired by Eddie Izzard.. whose presence may, or may not, have had something to do with the somewhat surreal flights of fancy between more scripted serious questions.
From the transcript –
Eddie Izzard[EI]: Okay. Thank you very much to the ladies and gentlemen of the media. Well just wait a brief second here while everyone goes. And we should probably juggle at this point or do some strange song and dance routine.
Tony Blair[TB]: Errr
EI: But Im not going to do that. Its a hypothetical.
TB: Can you juggle?
EI: I can actually juggle. Very badly. I can unicycle better than I can juggle, but its never been
TB: Yeah, my unicycle is not absolutely
[Laughs]
TB: Its not great but
EI: Heres a tip: if you want to learn the unicycle you start on the big ones because the small ones are harder because its the pendulum swing – the small ones have a very fast pendulum swing, the bigger ones have a slower, easier to learn on.
TB: Bit like government really isnt it!
Eddie Izzard also took the opportunity to promote his idea of an elected monarchy –
TB: I was just doing something with Billy Bragg next door actually whos got a very interesting idea of House of Lords reform, but as I always say to Billy, I mean if I could understand it I might do it but I mean it gets very
EI: Well Ive got an idea of an elected monarchy. That was my idea. But I put it to Prince Charles and he went argh..
TB: [Laughs]
EI: But I think everyone would like that except, and it would get the monarchy into shape. You know take the top 50 blue bloods and then theyve got to all go and put themselves to be head of state and then you know, wed say lets go and put Harry, lets go put William, lets go out one of the other ones, and elected monarchy could be the future of, through the third millennium
TB: Im not saying anything! Im going to just let you talk!
[Laughs]
EI: I just thought, it was an idea!
TB: There are some subjects that are big, you know
EI: You dont need to go there! Im just going to keep repeating it in places.
TB: Dont go there!
EI: Okay. Erm, well well move on.
I wonder if Eddie would be available for some of our local parties’ conferences…