There really is no way to sugarcoat this, I’m angry and like so many other people across Northern Ireland I feel powerless, helpless and deflated as I look around at the state of our country.
But my anger runs deeper than simply being frustrated and exasperated by the childish squabbling still going on between the DUP and Sinn Fein at the time of writing this.
I’m a child of the 80s and 90s, although I was largely unaffected personally by “The Troubles” as we moved through the decades I still felt a level of achievement every time we crossed another barrier towards integration, inclusion and coexisting.
In saying that politics bored me, I was desensitised to the Northern Ireland conflict and as a result of my disinterest, I was ignorant to much of the political madness that swirled around.
As a young reporter, I plunged myself into the lighter side of life specialising in showbiz and entertainment and I was happy, blissfully unaware most times of the utter chaos the lunatics on the hill were creating.
Every now and again I’d surface like a meerkat wondering what was going on then retreat yawning that “themuns” and “thoseuns” were acting the “ligs” and “usuns” were having to listen to their melty madness on every broadcast channel they could get their irritating voices and annoying faces on.
Call it “growing up”, “wise’ing up” or simply “moving on” with my life but at some point over the last five years I started to care, I mean really care what they were up to. My only child is coming five this December and I’m hurtling towards 40 next year – coincidence? Maybe!
So here we are, close to another deadline where a deal may be reached – I hope so. If that happens we’ll all be terribly relieved, so relieved that we might actually forget which moronic political parties caused the problem in the first place.
After November 1, Secretary of State James Brokenshire will be forced to impose a budget if no deal is done. At that point, it will be a case of Direct Rule in all but name and we know the Tories are not going to be generous in the long term.
Regardless of whether a deal is put in place or not I will still be angry, chances are I’ll be even angrier.
Why? Of course, there are the obvious reasons – people getting paid to do a job they aren’t doing, our democratic system failing us, the fact that I don’t believe there isn’t a workable compromise somewhere out there and the list goes on.
The deeper anger, the one that really hurts my heart and soul, the one that keeps me awake at night and makes me want to shout at the TV is the fact that I feel betrayed, let down, abandoned and neglected by those politicians who were elected to the seats of power to protect my family and I, whilst they enjoy their mid-talks tea that we – the taxpayer pays for – my four year old’s future is being ripped to shreds and people are dying.
Education budgets are being slashed and restricted beyond sensible levels, the health service is imploding and our critically ill patients are suffering.
Projects around infrastructure, environment, housing, the arts, sports and much more have halted and the uncertainty of Brexit is wreaking havoc socially, economically and mentally with people up and down the country.
We’ve had no government since January, they’ve missed deadline after deadline to broker a deal. They’ve issued excuse after excuse as to why they can’t find a compromise and we have just sat back and let them.
What I want to know is whilst chaos engulfs our society who is really profiteering? Who is benefiting? What deals are being done that probably wouldn’t have been done otherwise.
Call me a conspiracy theorist, joke about my tinfoil hat if you must…but ask yourself this – who is the real winner and what do the DUP and Sinn Fein stand to gain by forcing the country into deadlock and its people into poverty and despair?
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