WARNING: the following article may contain elements of truth.
The gongs of Big Ben that welcome 2017 will be greeted not but the clinking of glasses and a chorus of Auld Lang Sang, but rather a huge sigh of relief. 2016, the year from hell will finally be behind us.
It brought a cull of beloved musicians and artists, Brexit, and now, the rise to power of the Donald.
Yes, it’s true, the unthinkable has happened, a man who is a stranger to truth and taste, who lives in a golden tower and who looks like he has had three coats of Ronseal and a mummified ferret on his head, will be president of the United States.
If things keep going as they are, next year the Grim Reaper will take his scythe to the Rolling Stones and surviving Beatles while Marine Le Pen will become president of France.
Still, believe me folks, the satire it’ll be so great, you’ll get fed up laughing, believe me.
Anyway, the Donald won bigly after getting almost two million fewer votes than his opponent. In America, it’s not the number of votes that count but where they are cast.
The House of Representatives is openly gerrymandered by the Republican party while the Senate, where all states are regarded as equal, favours the Republicans who have higher levels support in more, but less populous states.
Meanwhile, the Electoral College, which actually elects the president, disproportionately favours, you guessed it, less populous states that tend to be Republican.
So was this an election or a coup d’état? Probably an election but given past shenanigans who can say?
The National Security Agency has claimed Russia hacked the election to get Trump elected, but they’re probably sneering, sore-loser, liberal types. Old Vlad, ruler of a country where journalist and opponents die in strange mysterious circumstances, made it clear where his sympathies lie, and as one pithy commentator said, why spend billions on tanks and planes when you can get your guy into the White House with a $1,000 laptop?
Just when you think things could not go any lower, Comey the FBI director, hereto a pro-Hillary stooge, throws a hand grenade into the whole thing by saying there are hundreds of thousands of e-mails that MAY be relevant to his interminable investigation into Hillary.
Everyone assumes the worst and her numbers tank. It turns out the e-mails may have been related to Anthony Weiner, a congressman known largely, if that is the right word, for sending pictures of his, er, weiner to women.
Trump promptly praised Comey for having the integrity to help him in his hour of need but then, with a few days to go, when Comey declares there was nothing to the e-mails, he promptly becomes an establishment lackey again.
In another sign that this campaign was so bizarre as to be almost beyond belief, the fact one candidate had the endorsement of the Klu Klux Klan was not a matter of debate or even surprise.
Trump discovered early on that he could say and do whatever he wanted; each outrage only him even more popular.
He boasted he could shoot somebody in broad daylight and Fifth Avenue without it affecting his popularity and you know what? He was right. The man with the Golden Throne who says it’s smart not to pay taxes, is going to lead the suckers that do to the promised land.
What’s more, he claims he will repatriate all the jobs that were outsourced to CHI-NA by him and people like him, including presumably, the ones that made his ‘Make America Great Again’ hats.
All the illegals will be kicked out because they’re rapists and Bad Hombres, and Muslims will be banned from coming into the US. Those that are already there will be forced to register.
Capping this disgrace, the shameful internment of loyal Japanese-Americans in the hysteria following Pearl Harbor is being used to justify and legitimise it.
This apparently is not bigotry or racism, just telling it like it is.
Polls, a discredited tool I know, indicate the majority of Trump voters do not see him as qualified for the job, but voted for him anyway. I don’t know how the next four years will pan out but the early signs are not good.
The Donald looked like a startled rabbit when he visited Obama in the Oval office. He has made conciliatory noises but the rogue’s gallery he has lined up for his cabinet, make me nostalgic for the warm fuzzy days of ‘W’, Cheney and Rumsfeld.
Trump seems determined to have as many family members as possible involved government and his daughter Ivanka sat in while he welcomed the Japanese Prime Minister, Mr. Abe to Trump Tower.
The next four years are going to be a circus.
In the last few days he agreed to paid out $25 million in a civil fraud case and nobody seems to care.
He says he will make persecution of certain groups, either by country of origin, faith, sexual orientation or gender the law of the land and his voters don’t seem to mind.
The so-called liberal media that gave him a free ride, who never mentioned his pending court cases, who never asked him to explain when America ceased to be great, who let him off the hook about his thousands of past lawsuits and tax avoidance will sit back and let him take America to the cusp of fascism.
They created this monster and it will devour them.
- He can mock the disabled and his voters don’t think it is important.
- He can have the full support of the Klu Klux and his voters don’t mind
- He can boast about abusing his positon of wealth and power to indecently assault women and his voters don’t mind
- He can make ‘facts’ up as he goes along and his voters don’t mind
- He can insult Mexicans and his voters don’t mind.
- He can avoid taxes and his voters don’t mind.
- He can demonise a billion people and his voters don’t mind.
- He wants to take away women’s rights and turn the clock back forty years and his voters don’t mind.
The bitter musing of a member of the liberal elite? Jamais! I’m just telling it like it is (maybe), because these things are only true if you believe them. Reality no longer matters.
Sam Thompson is an occasional blogger, writer and historian, his latest book is ‘The Lesser Evil: A Political & Military History of World War II 1937-45‘.
You can find him on Twitter at: @JarrieSam