It was nice knowing you all

Oh dear!

  • Henry94

    And they expect us to believe that?

  • GrassyNoel

    I wouldn’t worry too much about this ‘scientific’ hypothesis.

    Look at Paisley, for f*ck’s sake, he’ll probably outlast us all…

  • Stamper

    Bullshit.

  • Mick Fealty

    We should keep that one pinned permanently to the top of the site!!!

  • mickhall

    Oh dear indeed, but if true how do we explain Dr Paisley, the exception that proves the rule perhaps.

  • Aaron McDaid

    That doesn’t prove that cynicism is bad for your health. It could be the other way around for all we know – bad health can cause cynicism. Or more likely, both are caused by something underlying.

    Pretending you’re not stressed or cynical (i.e. denial) is probably worst of all.

    Why is it that most good science is ruined at the last minute by either the scientist or journalist or both mixing up cause and effect? I expect we’ll shortly be told to avoid hospitals because hospitals seem to be full of sick and injured people.

    What is needed now is an experiment where random participants are asked to try to change/deny their cynicism – will their health improve or get worse or maybe not change?

    And we need to start teaching basic logic, cause and effect and so on in school. I won’t apologise for being cynical about this ‘finding’.

  • The Dubliner

    Well, I guess I get to live a long and healthy life, then.

  • Way Icit

    mickhall “Oh dear indeed, but if true how do we explain Dr Paisley”

    The Good Lord is punishing us!

  • This is old, really old. They used to call it “Type A personality”.

  • pith

    mickhall: “…but if true how do we explain Dr Paisley”.

    Do you mean explain Dr Paisley or just the Dr bit?

  • Rory

    This reports should alarm me. But I take heart from knowing that Mark Twain lived to a ripe and happy old age and that the king of modern cynics, Ambrose Bierce, died (or at least disappeared mysteriously)at a goodly age while participating in the Mexican Revolution (of 1810-20).

    Besides which I am certain that a lack of cynicism is bad for the ould mental faculties.

    p.s. If you don’t already smoke, do take it up when you’re 60. Nicotine is the very best protection against Alzheimer’s Disease.

  • Carson’s Cat

    “And they expect us to believe that?”

    Post of the week for me!

  • “Paisley … smirk … Paisley” – let’s hope smug self-righteousness doesn’t turn out to be fatal, otherwise Sluggerdom’s doomed. I mean seriously, of all the f*cking things you can throw at that blinkered bigoted fool Paisley, cynicism! If-f*cking-only.

  • Rory

    While we are on the subject of health advice. you already have had my good advice on Alzheimer’s and tobacco, perhaps I should say something about “drink”.

    Studies have apparently demonstrated that long term excessive drinking of Guinness stout may lead to short term memory loss in men.

    After many years, Herself has, somewhat begrudgingly, come round to accept the evidence before her very eyes in support of this thesis. And it would be a brave man indeed, scientist or no, who who would contradict Herself.

    The better off among you may find some consolation in knowing that the same alarming symptons, and often diagnosed as “Alzheimer’s Disease”, although almost certain to occur if one trades fraudelently in Guinness plc shares, need not alarm one.

    With the aid of a good lawyer this is only temporary and the more serious effects, such as “going to the slammer” may be almost certainly alleviated by a new miracle drug called interestingly enough, “companychairmanicin”.

    A full return to a completely useful and productive working life in the Bahamas, labouring in the sun, checking one’s dividends and bonus payments is almost certainly assured.

    Isn’t science wonderful?

  • esmereldavillalobos

    Yes, Rory, the stats do show that people who smoke don’t get Alzheimers: could this be that a lot of them are dead before they reach the stage of dementia? Just a thought…

  • Damn, they must be cynical as hell in Mozambique, Malawi and Zambia. Myself, I’ve thrown so many Bud longnecks at the TV at CNN that I shouldda been dead years ago.

    On the other hand, I’d expect a majority of Americans to live forever after electing Dubya twice. Feckin’ eejits.