Nolan throws wobbly over weighty issue…

RADIO Ulster’s fatboy shock jock, Stephen Nolan, almost bust a blood vessel this morning after he was described in the Tele (not online) as ‘roly-poly’ and a ‘tubby talking machine’. This was in the context of a story reporting slagging off residents of an Antrim estate as ‘trailer trash’ and described Ardoyne as a ‘hell hole’. Laughing at yourself is never quite as easy as dishing it out others, even if it was ‘light-hearted banter’, eh Stephen? (I think he likes the attention really.)

  • Fanny

    How much does he weigh? Is he obese or just plain fat?

    Sorry, not PC. I’m a Macuser you see.

  • John Maynard

    I heard it this morning – the phrase “He can give it but he can’t take it” has rarely been more appropriate. He was bleating and whining at the guy from the Telegraph like nobody had ever said anything so horrible and irresponsible about anyone in the entire history of journalism.

  • DCB

    I hated him before this, bad enough that he’s on Radio Ulster, but we do not need him fouling the air on the otherwise excelant, radio 5 live.

    I actually hate him more than Eamonn Holmes

    He’s now saying that the trailor trash remark was a joke. If so then whats wrong with having a wee joke at fat boys weight.

  • DCB

    Listening to the show, very, very, Alan Partridge.

    “lets put the journalist who wrote it on the TV” – classic.

  • na

    re: Nolan

    Can being full of shit affect your weight?

    Tabloid tedium.

  • na

    To paraphrase the subs only link:

    Residents hit out after Nolan brands Ardoyne ‘a hell-hole’

    By Marie Louise McCrory

    SHOCK-jock Stephen Nolan has got himself into trouble with a north Belfast community after saying their home area was a “hell-hole”.

    The BBC Radio Ulster presenter made the comment on his morning programme yesterday after interviewing a man who had been a victim of a sectarian attack while walking home to Ardoyne.

    Nolan, pictured, was interviewing Damian O’Loan (23), the son of police ombudsman Nuala O’Loan, who was attacked with metal bars in the Oldpark area.

    The 23-year-old was assaulted as he walked to his Ardoyne home in the early hours of Monday June 11 and suffered serious head and arm injuries.

    Asking why the young man still lived in the area following the attack, he said: “If you can afford not to live there, why would you live there?

    “Why would you put yourself in that danger?

    “Get out of the hell hole and I label it a hell-hole because it nearly took your life.

    “I’m expressing the views of some people who might say get yourself into a nice safe spot like Craigavad, Bangor.”

    A BBC spokesman said “no offence” was meant but the comments prompted calls from residents in Ardoyne who defended their area.

    Last night Fr Aidan Troy, parish priest of Holy Cross church, said Ardoyne did not deserve the moniker.

    “These are the children who walked to Holy Cross. These are the brave parents who defended their children,”

    he said.

    “There has just been a hugely successful Fleadh. I had word from the police who said that up until Sunday they were happy it had gone well.

    “I’m the first to say Ardoyne has big issues but I would challenge anyone to say it was worse than anywhere else.

    “If that’s a hell hole, I’m very proud to live in a hell hole.”

    A BBC spokesman said: “The comment was made during a live interview with a victim of a serious attack and was made in reference to that attack.

    “No offence was intended to the Ardoyne community.”

  • Dr Strangelove

    You are right DCB, it is appallingly bad judgement to have him on radio 5. The mock indignation and arrogance of the lard ass are a bit to much to take. I think a lot of his gratuitous body mass must be taken up by his ego.

  • na

    I support the CHS (ches,t heart and stroke) and regularly give money to their campaigns.

    Campaigns on obesity are damaged by pie eating super sized shameless plumpers like Nolan.

    Hey – Nolan – Stop with the battered Mars bars you fat feck.

    And stop doing a base populist crapfest radio programme. (bring back that easy listening twat they sacked to make space for Nolan, and it must have been a big space they made, and George Jones.)

  • na

    I have it on good authority that the chiefs of Radio Ulster consider Mr Nolan the biggest thing to hit local radio in decades.

    That’s why they had to reinforce the toilets, increase the water pressure and employ a man to put the shoes on obese presenters.

  • Setanta

    Oh, and his show is awful as well.

  • JohnKingii

    Hellhole was the completley wrong term to use should have been s**thole.

  • Crataegus

    This one has brightened up my day, you know what they say food is the best therapy.

    Want to loose weight let me recommend small town India, a stone a month guaranteed perhaps a lot more. No need to worry about a diet the cure is in the air or is it the water?

  • Dread Cthulhu

    Crataegus: “Want to loose weight let me recommend small town India, a stone a month guaranteed perhaps a lot more. No need to worry about a diet the cure is in the air or is it the water? ”

    It could be the food…

    its called “dysentary,” I believe.

  • na

    you know what they say food is the best therapy.

    Do you really think Nolan needs that much therapy? Jesus he must be having therapy 15 or 20 times a day.

  • slug

    To be honest I think BBC NI is so dismally bland most of the time that Nolan coming out and saying that Ardoyne is a HELL HOLE seems refreshing.

    As for Father Troys line: “I would challenge anyone to say [Ardoyne] was worse than anywhere else” how did he keep a straight face? Lets be realistic.

  • Smiles

    The Antrim story was first broken by Conor Spackman in the Antrim Guardian last night and was picked up by the Telegraph this morning. Noticeably the only thing different in the Telegraph version were the gratuitous weight insults – so perhaps Nolan does have a point? Having said that he has used these weight insults cleverly to deflect from the issue, which was calling people in Antrim trailer trash in the first place. If that was a joke as he said it was, then firstly it is fair game to insult him as a joke too, and secondly, Billy Connolly is safe in a job.
    One other side point is that the profile of Nolan on the BBC website jokes about the fact that he put a stone on during the weight loss challenge.

  • DCB

    The fact that he might be right about Ardyone and parts of Antrim is besides the point.

    He’s a fat, self-obsessed, cnut.

    He must be removed from 5 live.

  • DCB


    Exactly, he self-consiously uses it as a selling point. So what does he expect.

  • na

    Is this the first time Nolan has been discussed here?

    And none of it is about content?

    Just about him being an idiotic over-weight prick?

    How long has he been on Radio Ulster as a ‘shock jock’ and the first time he is discussed on Slugger’s he is completely ridiculed?

    Not one positive about this man expressed?

    Never discussed before and his weight is the only issue that is worth Slugger contributors talking about?

    Listen up BBC – this light weight/heavy weight is the only thing on so gets an audience but universally despised.

    No fans here, where are they?

    Put George Jones on instead, those crap phone spoofs were more convincing than the chubby one’s fake angst.

  • Crataegus


    As Dread pointed out small town Indian Cuisine really is the best therapy. Guaranteed to work. Two month I reckon.

  • Miss Fitz

    The Nolan Show has been discussed on Slugger on several previous occasions, and from time to time contents of the show are brought to light on this forum.

    I associate the word ‘shock jock’ with people like Don Imus and Howard Stern. Stephen Nolan is no shock jock, and it does the term a disservice.

  • na

    Now for some proper criticism of Nolan –

    During the whole ‘pride’ debate he had callers for and against.

    A woman, clearly Christian, expressed the usual Christian position that homosexual sex was perverse.

    Instead of countering the orthodoxy she was expressing Nolan decided he would repeatedly grill her on what exactly she did in bed.

    This debased the debate on homosexuality to competing definitions of ‘perversion’ and Nolan was asking a caller to describe sexual activity that could not be broadcast on radio regardless of the caller’s willingness or not to divulge.

    Homosexuality was reduced to a comparative freak show by him.

    He was shown up by the caller that said they had a full and active sex life but refused to illegally discuss sexual positions on his show.

    He bullied, harangued and repeatedly tried to push the caller into describing her sexual positions, not sex life, as if this affected the debate knowing full well the questions he asked couldn’t have answers broadcast.

    Smart boy’s counter to a biblical criticism of homosexuality was to imply that maybe the caller had let he husband put something somewhere other than her vagina.


  • Belfast Gonzo

    Oh the list goes on. Nolan actually lets some pretty good issues slip through his chubby little fingers in order to bring us more shock/horror crap.

    Remember on Five Live, prostrate cancer became nothing more than a joke about him getting his cock out in front of a doctor.


    I’m only surprised it hadn’t retracted into the flab and it was actually visible. Thank God it was radio.

  • Rab

    Has Nolan divulged his own sexual orientation?

  • Jim

    I thought it was well known that Stephen Nolan is himself homosexual – not that it is in any way relevant to the discussion

  • na

    Has Nolan divulged his own sexual orientation?

    I think he swings.

    Between hoping and desperate.

  • na


    As you rightly point out just being a homosexual doesn’t mean you benefit other homosexuals or discussion on it through your every word.

    And Nolan’s sexuality doesn’t count.

    But he brought a biblical criticism of homosexuality down to ‘whatabout’ where your husband might stick his ‘what ya ma call it’. It was teenager standard debate. Pointless and juvenile.

    I would say he only does himself a disservice but I suspect he might not be that good at servicing anyone else (that’s Nolan standard debate, what he has received throughout this topic, what he practises and what he deserves)

  • Crataegus

    Has Nolan divulged his own sexual orientation

    Perhaps he prefers toad in the hole or something spicy with a dish on the side, followed by the occasional tart and full cream. All a bit cheesy (like the show) and a matter for him.

  • Setanta

    I think one of the main reasons that the content of the show is not bing discussed is the fact that so many agree that it is low brow, amateurish rubbish. Let’s hear someone defend it then…

    This seems lost on the bunch of wooly headed colonialist, morons that run BBC NI – they hold Nolan up as quality, give investigative journalism a bad name and actually belive that we want to see more of those bloody ‘day out in Bangor’ films from the 50’s instead of facing up the real issues.

  • rab

    Has Nolan divulged his own sexual orientation?

    The question was asked within the context of Post 23 where it was felt that Nolan’s lack of impartiality was highlighted when he ridiculed a caller in the most unprofessional and vulgar terms in response to her expression of opposition to homosexuality.

  • rab

    sorry Post 22

  • irritated

    For goodness sake, wise up, so Nolan is a bit of a chubster…who the hell cares, the majority of people in Northern Ireland including most people who contribute to slugger and a sizeable number of politicians.

    And the Ardoyne is a hellhole and the people in that Antrim estate probably are trailer trash…why the vitriol?

  • ulickmagee

    ah i can feel the smugness rising in me…..

    several weeks ago i posed the question how shit is the ni media becoming…….

    today ladies and gentlemen i give you steven nolan in a nicki from big brother moment showing what hes really about …..ego, bullshit and tabloid journalism

    i pose the question again big waste of time or just big waist

    oh and for the telegraph to put that on the front page dear god how low are they going to go

    stevie boy youre figures are up?

    let me give you a clue 8.56 – end of good morning ulster –

    9.00am headlines –

    9.05 am most people listen to the three seconds after you appear panting out of breath then realise oh sweet feck off button off button

    same as 1.32pm when go on go go hugo fecking duncan appears diddly eye diddly eye – oh fecking choke

    so lets call it as it is mr nolan – when people see a car crash they stare at it just like your show and the people appearing on it confirm that either theyre looking for 15 minutes off fame or tricia hasnt started

    tomorrow mark my words he will return to this story why because he’s upset not because he’s caused offence but because he’s been seen to be nothing more than a walking talking anus

    again i ask…… media how shite is it

  • Fraggle

    Regarding Ardoyne and the incident in question, it happened in a nearby Loyalist area while Mr O’Loan was on his way to Ardoyne.

    I think all the fat jokes and insults about Nolan are totally over the top here. I’m wondering why they haven’t been removed yet.

  • Garibaldy


    I take it Nolan is not your favourite person. In fairness to him, he may be a loud mouth, obnoxious so and so, but I’ve heard him give politicians a much worse and harder time than Paxman, particularly when he was on Citybeat.


    ulick you’re grammar is atrocious tonight but you are god nolan is indeed the worst atrocity of the post conflict ni

  • ulickmagee

    Fraggle – you bit of a fatty too….hmmmm wanna cry about it …..hmmmmm maybe you a nolan can hold hands and tell each other stories

    Garibaldy – citybeat radio listen to by taxi drivers and people called billy who with their stump leg are working in late night car parks

    giving local politicians a grilling more than paxman – a chimp with a crayon could interogate them more than nolan

    whats nolans weight got to do with it – remember he didnt get upset at the fact he made the remarks but his weight ……..

    what terminology will he use next and then excuse as he was having a laugh

  • bob&terry

    ulick spot on man

    nolan has double standards and double chins

  • peterosullivan

    unfair unfair unfair

    a guy says to a girlfriend what do you want me to do to you sexually

    girl says i want you to feck me somewhere really dirty

    guy says ok ill take you to ardoyne

  • Aidan

    I would have expected the replies in this thread to be a bit more highbrow, given that the main criticism of Nolan appears to be that he’s a useless tabloid shock-jock. And a fat one to boot.

  • Patrique

    I have no idea who Stephen Nolan is, but he obviously knows a lot about Antrim, many of the residents in the town would fit with the “trailer trash” description.

    However I would worry more about Councillor watson from Antrim calling travellers “the scum of the earth” and suggesting that all Eastern europeans could be paedophiles, based ion the grounds that if some N.Irish people were paedophiles, given our laws, well all Eastern Europeans could be because they did not have laws. He says these things in the council chamber, makes Ron Atkinson look like a good guy.

    He then attacked immigrants because one household were holding wild all night parties, and said that foreigners should more or less adhere to the maxim “when in Rome, do as the Romans do”. That’s exactly what these people were doing, following the trailer trash culture rampant in parts of Antrim.

  • Cynic

    As a good man of the cloth Aiden Troy didnt tell a lie when he said of Ardoyne:

    ” I would challenge anyone to say it was worse than anywhere else”

    There are many other hell holes in Belfast that are just as bad as Ardoyne. Should we start a Belfast Hell Hole competition? Points could be awarded for local civic amenities:-

    sectarian garffitti
    flags per lampost
    mural quality
    burned out cars
    drug street price
    no of stray dogs per square metre