Defining stupid questions

I guess I am at best a ‘passive blogger’, and mostly just respond to really important events, or guilt trips from Mick. So, here I was thinking….. Bank Holiday weekend…. bit of sun and bikini time in Rostrevor and nothing much to blog for Slugger. Then I get this e-mail from Jim Fitzpatrick and the Politics Show, and I felt duty bound to share it.

It comes as a great disappointment to me and my colleagues that we will no longer be able to ask stupid questions. For the first time in our varied and undistinguished careers we will now have to think of intelligent ones.

I always thought it, now Jim has said it. Go raibh maith agat.

The full, intellectually stimulating contribution is below the foldHello again

There’s been some comment recently from political quarters that journalists (particularly in the BBC) aren’t supportive enough of the historic developments in the process. It seems too many hacks here are still asking “stupid” questions. Such questions, it seems, do not suit the times and will no longer be tolerated by the new elite.

It comes as a great disappointment to me and my colleagues that we will no longer be able to ask stupid questions. For the first time in our varied and undistinguished careers we will now have to think of intelligent ones.

But, just for old times sake and to ensure they don’t go completely to waste, here’s a few stupid questions I was saving up for future interviews that I’ll now never use:

After eating, do amphibians have to wait one hour before getting out of the water?

A stitch in time saves nine what?

Could crop-circles be the work of a cereal killer?

Do witches run spell checkers?

What’s the synonym for thesaurus?

Where in the nursery rhyme does it say Humpty Dumpty is an egg?

How do you know if honesty is the best policy unless you’ve tried some of the others?

Why can’t you make another word using all the letters in “anagram”?

Why do people tell you when they are speechless?

If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

Is the gulag being built in West Tyrone for journalists and intellectuals going to be funded under PFI?

There, now I feel better.

This week Rosy finds out if the Scottish electronic voting experiment is likely to be replicated here. Robin has more on that here.

On the programme we’ll hear from the former talks chairman, Senator George Mitchell, and the Secretary of State, Peter Hain, as we look ahead to the big day on Tuesday.

And for all those who don’t think we’re supporting the process – don’t worry the “I ‘heart’ Ian and Martin” t-shirts have been ordered.

See you Sunday at noon on BBC1.

Jim

PS – In the spirit of media control which seems to have descended on Stormont, our cameras have been banned from the visitors’ gallery at Parliament Buildings where we intended to bring you live pictures of Tony Blair and Bertie Ahern observing proceedings on Tuesday. It seems the Speaker was a little peeved that Tony and Bertie didn’t want to stay for the full hour-long spectacular and only promised to pop into the gallery for their chosen highlights. The result – our cameras are banned lest we show the premiers departing at the interval. Now, I could choose to ask the premiers why they decided to avoid the full show but that might be a stupid question.

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  • jake

    now, if only brian rowan was still at the bbc jim gibney wouldn’t be complaining about stupid questions (barney only ever asked ‘helpful’ questions) and jim fitzpatrick wouldn’t have to send out such e-mails

  • marty (not ingram)

    Looks like Jim has simply passed on one of those irritating chain emails that do the rounds.